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Has an incident ever affected anyone that you thought about for an extended period of time.
The most recent incicent that affected me for an extended period of time was a double fatal on I-81 that 2 Marines died. Even after a station debriefing, this incident still comes to mind.
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Dustin J. Millis on
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There have been a few that stuck with me for awhile or still do. We just had a 22 guy hang himself after turning on all the gas in his apartment and stabbing himself a few times in the stomach. That was just this last thursday. I think thats one thats probably gona be in the back of my mind for awhile.
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Permalink Reply by lutan1 on
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Putting it back where it belongs and "filing it away" "controlling your emotions" is not resolving the situation for some, that is old school therapy. Back then, you were either man enough to "handle it" or you hit the bottle, if that didn't work you went onto retracting from family, friends and worse committing suicide. If that system worked so well then why is NOBODY using it today?
Amen brother!
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Permalink Reply by paula beckham on
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chief art has the right idea i do a similar thing eventhou ive only being in for a year we have seen many fatal mvas in our area over that time
i believe that being a victim of abuse when young has given me a hand up when dealing with this as i all ready have a mental way of dealing with ugly situations. which is much like art suggests a kind of file area where i shift bad memorys to where they are associated to something peacefull like scenery. they never actually go away and can surface on occasion i have found when that happens they bring the associated memory with them which takes the edge off
well thats my 2 cents worth on the subject
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Permalink Reply by chris jarvis on
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hey guys, the one that sticks on me just recently happened on july 24, 2009. in front of my house. i heard a loud bang, i knew it was a wreck by the sound of it. i ran around the house to the dust and debris still falling, got on the radio and called dispatch. me and my neighbor which is also a ff ran over to find our cheif laying in the ditch, ejected. i tried as much as i could to save him, did everything i knew to do. nothing worked. we lost a very good man that day. i see that spot every time i walk outside.
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Permalink Reply by Cassie on
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It was a suicide. Man shot himself through the mouth. I never saw him, so there aren't any images of him to bother me. We pulled on scene after the officers cleared us to come in. I was about to walk in with my crew when the officer asked for someone to talk to the wife. I volunteered, figuring the wife might find it easier to talk to another woman. I opened the door to the cop car where she was and suddenly she was in my arms, clinging to me, crying.
I took her to a neighbor's house and the neighbor and I stayed with her for an hour until the chaplain came. She kept asking why. I didn't know what to say, all I could do was hold her hand as she tried to come to terms with the sudden and violent loss of her husband.
After being with her for an extended period of time, it was hard for me not to become emotionally involved, hard for me to not wonder how she was doing... hard to just let it go. But, the support of my crew that night helped a lot, talking and hands on each others' shoulders. The chief called the following day to check in on me.
I talked to a couple people about it afterwards, esp. when it was weighing on me. I'm very sensitive to other people's emotions, so it was hard to let it go. But over time, and with some good conversations and some prayer, I moved on. I think females, in general, have an easier time opening up about whatever is bothering them, but I think it's very important for guys as well. Not just debriefing, but talking to someone when it's weighing heavily on your mind, sharing the burden makes it lighter.
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Permalink Reply by Laurie Hicks on
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One call that continuously haunts me was a fatal house fire, we were told no one was home at the time by local police never conducted a search, I was doing exterior attack when a 43 year vet came over to me and said ur pissin water on a body, i thought he was crazy and continued my work, during mop up i was asked to climb a ladder where sure enough there was a victim at the top, he seemed to know that person was home even though noone else did, and to this day i have flashbacks of that fire while i sleep, sometimes i wake up from a dead sleep paniced and thinking my own homes on fire, amazing how our jobs can affect every aspect of our lives, So yeah i think its normal to have incidents come to mind,
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Permalink Reply by Cory Deaton on
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My first call was a MVA and a 13 year girl was killed. I haft to pass the spot she was killed everyday going to work so it reminds me everytime i go by.
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Oh wow. I'm so sorry. Knowing the person makes it so much harder. If you don't mind my asking, how're you doing/holding up?
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Permalink Reply by Sarah Tinsley MacKenzie on
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ive been to many fatals and im almost 18 in the last 7 months weve had 10 fatals, im only in a small brigade so that is alot, ive only really been to four, but only one was when i was right in the scene doing an extrication my way of dealing with it is talking to my brigade and writing about it, the last havent really botheed me that much , i find with incidents like that i can black them out, im so pumped on the adrenalin on way to call im totally focused, but i must say my 1st fatality i went to i was only on road patrol, the thing that sadened me the most was "what will his family be thinking" mainly because a few months before it i lost my brother in law to a tragic accident, it wasnt a mva but the fact of loosing someone so quickly and how the family would be was one of my biggest issues, but i soo got over it, i try not to dwell on the past, because tomorrow is a new day
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Permalink Reply by walmart on
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2 come to mind. A fatal where a person I used to race with died. I responded to the station and was told when one of my ast. chiefs to go home because they were doing accident reconstruction. I over heard people talking about the truck and it clicked on me. I went home, but got a call to go back out there to help cleanup.
The other one was a 5 person fatal car wreck. A father and his daughters were killed by a drunk driver. Turned out that 2 of them were pregnant. That was a hard one. I'm trying to start a family (actually getting married next week) and it hit hard. My fiance and I got into a big argument the next day. We have a debrief and that helps. Not only were we not aloud to talk about it with our love ones, but they wouldn't understand. It's so much easier talking to someone that has been through that same stuff.
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it gets better with time i guess,but overall im ok. thanks for your concern. stay safe
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Permalink Reply by Don Vuletic on
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Pulled up on a motorcycle MVA with a van. The rider didnt have a helment on and the van pulled out in front of him. I ran up and started to evaluate him and radio for EMS. It was one of my friends from HIgh School. It felt like his eyes were fixed on me asking for help. He did not survive the accident. A year later, I responded to a call and it was his wife who I also knew. I finally told her I was the first one to be with him and tried to answer all her questions of his last minutes. She was crying and and thanking me for having a friend with him in his last minutes on this earth. It was the hardest thing that I ever had to do and yes I cried with her. Those two times were the hardest times I have ever had in the fire service for 32 years.
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