Subject: Common Sense Obituary

Mr. Common Sense, birth date unknown.

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.

He will be forever remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as: knowing when to come in out of the rain, why the early bird gets the worm, life isn't always fair, I should work for what I want and maybe it was my fault.

Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you earn) and reliable parenting strategies (adults, not children are in charge).

His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a six-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition

Common Sense lost ground when: children could become abusive in class, and parents attacked teachers for doing the job, that they themselves failed to do in disciplining their unruly children. It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer Aspirin, sun lotion or a sticky plaster to a student; but could not inform the parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.

Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband; God and prayer were taken out of our schools, churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims. Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar can sue you for assault.

Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, decided to sue the company that sold it to her and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.

Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason. He is survived by three stepbrothers; I Know my Rights, Someone Else is to Blame, I'm a Victim and a sister Sue Happy.

Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone. It’s a shame, that not many could remember Mr. Common Sense, but then again, society has allowed us to forget.

My parents {and I’m sure your parents did also}, told me about Mr. Common Sense early in my life. They told me I would do well to call on him when making decisions. It seems he was always around in my early years but less and less as time passed by until today I read his obituary. Please join me in a moment of silence in remembrance. For Common Sense had served us all so well for so many generations.

Author unknown

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Comment by Oldman on January 27, 2009 at 9:30am
Ya know that might be funny if it wasn't the real world truth.
Comment by BillySFCVFD on January 26, 2009 at 7:24pm
Very good and very true. He needs to be resurrected. TCSS

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