I recently did a ride along with an ambulance company that my husband works with. I had to do the ride along because of a requirement I had to fill with the medical class that I am in right now. I have only worked with my husband on one other call which turned out to be a fatality. Coming from a previous department up north that I had worked on with my father bieng Fire Chief I have been used to the fact that working with family on various scenes is second nature to me. In fact I have several uncles and cousins from up north that I would see on a regular basis turn out to work side by side with me on some pretty grueling scenes. My husband has a lot less experience than me when dealing with medical calls and mass casualty incidents and I have seen him handle things a bit differently than me. He has been an EMT-Basic for just under a year now when I have been in EMS for 12+ years as an Intermediate, a firefighter for 17 years and also worked in an OR for 7 years as a surgical assistant. I have also realized that I obviously handle things a lot different than he does. I am the "just take it easy so we can get to the call in one piece" versus his "my ambulance has a ton of red lights and sirens and people better move out of my way because there is someone that needs help" attitude.
I know that I was the same way when I started out. I was very eager to get to the call and didn't care how I got there, I just had to get there because someone needed me. However obviously as I grew up and now currently hold an officer position on the fire department my views of things have changed. I now have people that I have to watch over as well as myself. I am in charge of other people's safety as well as my own now even more so. I am finding out that after working a plane crash with my husband he viewed me as bieng extremely excited and jumpy on the call. He thought that I was very nervous and lacked focus. I saw myself as taking the officer's approach to the call and thinking in terms of my scene size-up, number of patients that I had to deal with, is my crew ok, focusing on my patient and the treatment and then finally getting the patients out of the scene and getting them to the hospital. It is what I have done on every single plane crash that I have ever worked in the past. I noticed that as soon as the call was recieved my husband was driving a bit more eratically than I had previously noticed, he had tunnel vision, he was not where he needed to be as far as dealing with the patients (I didn't see him until our patient was almost totally packaged), and he had even told me to calm down because when we were taking the stretcher out of the back once on scene I accidently let it drop because I was not used to the electronic mechenism. The only time I have ever really lost focus on a call was whenever someone has been trapped in a structure fire or fallen through the roof or floor. I think at that point at least all of us would do that due to the fact that it is one of our own or a situation that we feel helpless in.
My question is has anybody else encountered this specific type of work related stress when working with loved ones on scene? If you have what are the ways that you have dealt with these issues so I can see if it will help me with my issues? Thanks for taking time to read my post because I really would like to start correcting this problem.