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Relationships in the firehouse...what's your take?
My boyfriend and I have been together for 2 years now, we met at the firehouse when i joined, and we have successfully managed to (as i like to say) 'divorce' on the fire scene. even when he was in serious danger, i kept my cool and continued to do what i was told. I know not everyone can accomplish that. i was just wondering if anyone else is in or has been in a successful firehouse relationship or if anyone is completely against it?
what's your opinion?
what's your opinion?
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Engineco913 on
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In my opinion, your a firefighter before you became in a relationship. Not all relationships end in a peaceful manner. With this being said, its up to both parties involved to remain professional, and keep their personal lives at the door before walking in the firehouse. It's a dangerous game we play, and we all need a clear mind before going to work. Remaining professional on both sides will speak milestones about who you are. I personally wouldn't date anyone from the firehouse (being a Lieutenant) I feel it would and or could become a conflict of interest, but thats just my opinion
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Permalink Reply by Kevin King on
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In short DONT DO IT,no matter it will cause some sort of a glich in the program,be it emotional or physical.Separate stations and shifts maybe but same house no good.Had some good friends that tried it,danger does strange things to emotions and it distracts everyone around.
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Permalink Reply by Sandy113 on
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googd points, both of you. i also feel that if you can't seperate personal time from fd time, then you shouldn't be together. at first me and my boyfriend weren't al;lowed on the same aparatus since he is a lieutenant, the higher ups thought that he might try to protect only me and ditch his crew when the shit hits the fan. however, we have both proved that we trust our fellow firefighters enough to know that when we aren't together on the firegrounds that the other is in safe hands.
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Emotions tend to override rational thought thus the possibility of someone getting hurt because of distraction
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Permalink Reply by turk182 on
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I know from my station that when we have to correct someone for something they did then either the boyfriend or the girlfriend try to stick up for each other and it should not be that way. If they did something wrong and the officer incharge wants to talk to the about it the the otherhalf of the couple should not get involved.
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Thats The Emotions thing I mentioned
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Permalink Reply by Dan Hoey on
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I think this type of thing is more dangerous then anything else women can do in this field. I am not trying to be an ass, but lets say you two break up and then you start dating another guy there..Nothing wrong with it except what do you think is going to be said?? Right or wrong you will get the rep of sleeping around the house and we all know in this world crap like that spreads to every house for miles. Is that fair no but thats issues I think hurt women in this field more then most others Again is it fair or right no but precipitation is more damaging sometimes then truth.
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Permalink Reply by Diana S on
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I believe that having a relationship in the fire service is fine, just don't have it with someone at the same fire station and maybe not even in the same division. That way there can be no misunderstandings that could lead to accusations to quid pro quo, discrimination, you promoted because of who you were dating, or sexual harassment. This could cause tension at the fire station, as well as big headaches for the department. I know many people who are dating within our department, but we are a large department and people can be moved to help prevent these situations.
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again, the 'divorcing' when in fd teritory helps out alot, especially when the other guys try to hit on me. boys will be boys i know.
another thing that was metioned was being in a situation where you knew your loved one was in danger and not being able to help. well last year we had a situation like that. we got a wires call at some little rancher where this old fat lady on O2 lived. well my boyfriend went in to get the lady out because the wire was live bouncing around in her front yard. at this point i knew my boyfriend was in there by himself(no other ff's just the fat lady) as he was trying to tell the stubborn fat lady that she had to leave the wire hit the water main and electrically charged everything in the house and set the two front rooms on fire. well needless to say i wasn't happy but i focused on the task at hand. i'm not gonna lie i was worried, as would anyone else be though. no one wants to see anyone else get hurt. but my boyfriend is a very compitent ff and i know he can make it on his own in a situation like that. thank god no one got hurt though...just spooked...you can't even begin to manage how that looked!
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Permalink Reply by nita on
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I've never had a serious relationship with a co-worker. Most of the time while I've been employed there , I've been married. I had about a 5 year span between my first and second marriage. Neither of my husbands were in the fire service. I did date a co-worker during that time but it wasn't serious...in other words it was just for our entertainment...and was kept private.
I have never worried about what people thought of me...if I did...I damn sure wouldn't have managed to be a carreer FF for 14 years, on the verge of making Captain in a dept. where I'm the only female. I had many people that were against my coming to work there and many people that thought I was there to sleep around with all the FF's. I finally just began saying "yes, I slept with him..and him...and him...and my next one is that new hot young one they just hired" You would be surprised the people that stay out of your business when you use reverse psychology.
Speaking from years of experience....THEY ARE TALKING ABOUT YOU ANYWAY....just because you are in the midst of MEN!!! And that must be the reason we choose to do what we do...lol...Like people in every profession don't have the same issues. We don't have the market cornered on attraction...it happens!!
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So your pre-judgment that we are all talking about you anyway says what that all men do that so all women are sleeping around This is why I hate this subject everyone wants to make the other side seem shallow and stupid. I can work with a women and not think about sleeping with them or talk about them behind there backs and I hope a women can work with me and not think I want to sleep with them or talk about them. I dont know maybe I am the odd person and having respect for a person no matter their sex race and orientation and work with them because of who they are and not what they are makes me the odd person out.
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Permalink Reply by ee779 on
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Normally, my opinion about dating someone from work or the same volunteer fire company is that somewhere there could be problems within the company. Because some might say one person gets treated differently because of a relationship or if it is a rocky relationship it very well could carry problems into the company. I have been seeing the same woman for about 10 years now we are both certified firefighters and officers. we had been members of different companies until a few yeras ago, she joined the company I belong to and I joined the one she belongs to. So far, foutunatly, there hasn't been any problems stemming back to our relationship and we are both currently holding officer positions in both companies. But, I have seen a nasty devorce nearly destroy a fire company.
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