Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by WestPhilly on October 25, 2009 at 8:55pm

Must you be so forthright?

Permalink Reply by WestPhilly on October 25, 2009 at 10:46pm

Speaking of avatars and "used to be" forthrightness, Caroline's avatar strikes me as more Artsy than pinupish. I kinda like it. (Even if I'm not her type.)

Permalink Reply by Ben Waller on October 25, 2009 at 11:05pm

Kali,

Focus on the JOB??? Why would anyone want to do that? We'd miss out on all of the other discussions/arguments, and be stuck with the basic engine vs. truck stuff wars if we just docused on the job.

Permalink Reply by Ben Waller on October 25, 2009 at 11:09pm

She has to be forthright fourthright. After all, she has forearms four arms.

Permalink Reply by Kevin Beahn on October 26, 2009 at 1:07am

well my input.... Your sexual preferences are your business and no one needs to get involved..... you like ppl of the same sex.... how does that concern anyone else....... it does not by any means change the person you are.... i strongly believe in Family with in my fire company and by NO means would go to the chief about it but next time u hear a remark of such speak up tell them to stop because u are not comfortable with their remarks..... if that does not work the only thing u can do is speak to the chief or other line officer.... Good luck

Permalink Reply by Allen Wahlstrom on October 26, 2009 at 1:15am

Ya know Kali, I never know how you feel on anything, you're just so wishy washy, Be a little more direct won;t ya?

So coming from a firefighter who has shaved his legs for the better part of 20 years (I race bicycles... it's a normal part of the cycling culture) and have been called everything from fagot to well, you get the gist, right?

Kali is dead on, grow a thick skin or go do something else. eggshells get crushed in firehouses, and you will quickly become a pariah in your house if you don't. I'm not saying that you should put up with harassment, but if you make it known you think we are all a bunch of uptight bible thumpers with narrow minds, life in your house will be very unpleasant. Oh wait, you already did...

Permalink Reply by Tony P on October 26, 2009 at 3:57am

I thought to myself - you're joking. Don't even bother reading the thread. Then I got caught by the first line. So, even though I'm not going to bother reading all the earlier posts, I will post my view.

What the hell has sexual preference got to do with fighfighting? Nothing, absolutely nothing. Totally irrelevant. If someone, anyone, brings it up in the workplace, wanting to insult another, they should be told to apologise and shut up in future or to leave, permanently.

Permalink Reply by Jack/dt on October 26, 2009 at 1:25pm

Caroline;

If you are bringing in your cause for equal rights and lecturing everyone then the firehouse is the wrong place for that. You're there to do a job. And no matter what you do or say or how good a firefighter you become there will be those that will NOT accept you. You're entitled to have anything you want on a face/space page but I would suggest that you do not include any mention of your department.

Thick skin is necessary but...vulgarities and derogatory comments, innuendos and sexual comments etc have NO place in the firehouse and is prohibited by law. Your best bet is to just be a firefighter probie (that happens to be a lesbian.) It is up to your officers to ensure that there is no hostility in the workplace. If they are part of the problem you then need to follow the chain of command up to see that the issue is dealt with. Failure on the part of your department to cease these activities clearly violates the law and puts them in an untenable position and wide open to financial damages if it persists and you pursue the issue.

I will say this, in my department we have two women who are out, one of whom is in my house. I am not aware of any issues arising from this and I know that it will not be tolerated in the dept. or my house. I am fortunate to work with a group of people that are very well educated and open-minded. The kind of behavior you are talking about simply would not be tolerated. The offender would be hammered immediately by all of us, not to mention our sister.

I made an earlier post that was deleted by the webchief. Please be assured that it was not an anti-gay/lesbian slam but a failed attempt at humor/sarcasm (and an attempt to bait those who do have a problem with gays/lesbian in the firehouse.)

Permalink Reply by Steve potter on October 26, 2009 at 2:16pm

Hey my little sister is gay not a firefighter but i know how unhappy she was till she told everyone she works in a welding plant mostly all men none treat her differnt. she is so much happier

Permalink Reply by John Crabbe on October 26, 2009 at 2:57pm

I would agree with the other comments here, however, I truly question the OP's motivation....is it firefighting or activism?

Permalink Reply by Caroline on October 26, 2009 at 2:58pm

hi kali, thank you for your lengthy opinionated response. but i'd like to say several things in my defense;
-yes, i did create an account on this site with the sole purpose of asking this question. But this is a site where i see personal life mixed with firefighting. its a social networking site for firefighters. i am perfectly allowed to come here and express my other life within my profile as there is more to me than firefighting.
i also seem to have miscommunicated, that i came into the firehouse expecting or trying to enlighten those people. my main goal of joining is not for lgbtq equality in the least. i responded to a kid asking me out, but saying i was seeing someone, and it clearly created some turmoil as he kept pestering me. im in an area where ive not had to hide my sexuality, so i told him. I'm sorry, i cant, im seeing someone. a girl. he outed me to my firehouse, something that i dont think is right. within the past 24 hours ive gotten a lot of support but none the less i dont want to be bashed.
my question didn't address your personal opinions of me, nor my openess with my sexuality. i asked for input to a situation, which i recognize this is. but your judgements of my photo and whatnot are really unecessary. just because i "dont ask questions" here or this is my first, has no on the nature of my question. i agree with many of the responses you recieved. you're wishy washy and quite passive agressive.
i dont sppreciate the bitter feelings.

Permalink Reply by Caroline on October 26, 2009 at 3:03pm

in my defense, i am not "lecturing" the firehouse. my personal life came up in a social situation, and this kid brought it to the entire firehouse. in no way do i want to change any backwards minds or educate where i work. thats not my job there.
but thank you very much.

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