Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Chance on January 18, 2008 at 9:16pm

im lost what the hell are u talking about

Permalink Reply by firemansbetterhalf on January 19, 2008 at 4:52pm

that is just it. it seems to me that adultry is a very big problem among firefighters. idon't understand how or why so many firefighters feel it is ok to cheat on there significant other, and why their friends at the station cover up for them. i'm not imagining it, it happens more then i'd like to see. i live in a very small town and our department isn't very big and it happens here way to much. my children along with many others look up to firefighters and i don't want them to grow up believing it is ok to cheat, but if that is what they see and hear that is what they will believe. of course this could just be the ramblings of a scorned woman.

Permalink Reply by Justin Nugent on January 19, 2008 at 8:06pm

nothing personal, but either i am blind, or it just doesn't happen in my department...

Permalink Reply by Lou Angeli on January 23, 2008 at 11:50pm

Hi,

What you've written goes back to why women were not permitted to join the volunteer or career fire services just a generation ago. Wives and girlfriends could not understand the need for women firefighters. Actually what they understood (and probably knew) was that living in such tight quarters in a close-knit family would give firefighters (male and female) the opportunity to stray. But the reality of the situation is that the decision to allow women firefighters had nothing to do with adultery -- it had to do with federal law. Fire departments could no longer reject women applicants because of sex. And so the stage was set -- pole and all!

Your commentary make it sounds like the depatment is running whorehouse rather than a firehouse. Is the entire department engaged in marital discord, or is it one or two members. Do you expect members to rat out other firefighters by posting a list on the web of "who's doin' who?" That would be libelous and slanderous, and fire administrators don't wanna play that game. I understand your anger but nearly 60% of the married population have acknowledged having affairs -- and it's not just in the firehouse.

Just a note -- Denis says "whatever happens in the firehouse, stays in the firehouse," and such an unwritten rule will be in place as long as there are firefighters serving on earth.

Do a bobbit -- that will drive home the point to everyone in your station,
Lou

Permalink Reply by Josh Marshall on January 24, 2008 at 12:05am

I havent seen anything like this in our deptartment...we are a small dept. about 25 members and if something did..another one would prolly step up and confront him/her. This is about brotherhood stuff like this shouldnt happen in our field!

Permalink Reply by Margaret on February 4, 2008 at 11:26am

I am a woman in a male orientated field. I have been cheated on in the past. I believe it has nothing to do with occupation. I'm sorry you feel the way that you do, but the bottomline, people cheat for a couple of reasons, one: it's just not right at home and unfortunately they are trying to find comfort elsewhere or since it's not right at home or in the relationship, the ability for the right person to come along is opened. Two: they will never be a monogamus person and Three: sometimes a situation comes up and things just happen, but then it's over. I do not condone any of it, but I am strong enough to move on and find the right person for me that would not cheat on me. After all I think I'm a wonderful person and deserves just as wonderful guy for me. I'm willing to wait and go thru the heartbreak until he comes along. So don't worry about what others are doing or saying, just move on.

Permalink Reply by Dino Brancato on February 13, 2008 at 3:18am

with all do respect cheating goes on at any job no matter where not just in the fire service i believe its totally unfair for you to sling such jabs at the fire service not all fire fighters are cheaters im sure if you were to do a study you would find more in the hospital or factory setting.

Permalink Reply by Brandy on March 22, 2008 at 9:50pm

i to have seen this going on in my own dept. although not in along time, and yoiur right it drives me nuts. I DON'T condone cheating, however it is hard to find people you can relate to that understand what you do or why you do it, i think thats why so many people start firehouse romances. I don't date from my own house cause if things don't work and you both move on its looked at as bed hoping, even if your not. if your going to date in your field keep it out of your dept even better if your a firefighter don't date a firefighter date a cop or an EMT, same for the other branches, cause they are still going to know what your going through and it won't be looked at as bed hoping, unless you are. Kids do look up to us, they want to be us when they get old enough, I don't want to see another generation of cheaters, lets try to bring our good name back.

Permalink Reply by bryan lamb on March 24, 2008 at 1:50pm

i married my wife 4 yrs ago and i love her more now than i did then she has given me 2 baby boys and it makes me sick to see a familey torn apart becouse someone does not have the guts to just say it isnt working no more insted they drag everyone in with them i will not lie for someone elses actions i didnt do it for my sister and i wont do it for anyone else i know how much it hurts to find out so better to not lie just come rite out and say it

Permalink Reply by Bill Brierton on March 25, 2008 at 8:44pm

Well I will disagree with you on this since I have been married for 21 years, and been a volunteer for 15, and I have never cheated so don't lump all of us in one pot. No my wife is not a fire fighter or EMT but has enough trust in me to know that I am honest with her. I can not speak for others but if they want to live that life then it is on them and they have to live with it.

Permalink Reply by Michelle Robertson on May 15, 2008 at 3:09pm

THis isn't just a firehouse problem I agree. Men and women will cheat where ever, when ever they feel like it. I don't condone it and really if it was happening in our Company, it would be addressed. It could cause way tomuch discord and hard feelings. I don't know what it's like where you are , butmost of us like to think of ourselves as family and family helps each other out, not be enablers. I married a fellow firefighter, but I sure was careful about accepting that first date. I was the first unmarried woman in our company, with only one woman before me who was EMS and married. Believe me, one mistep and I was told,lol, even if I didn't do anything. You can't blame it on the brotherhood or sisterhood of firefighting, it's ever where.

Permalink Reply by Joey "BigShow" De Piano on August 24, 2008 at 11:24pm

Bro First off I am a truck driver so understanding you are venting I don't take it to heart but we aren't all that way ok and the same applies to the fire , ems and police in fact it is everywhere right or wrong you have to remember one important thing FireFighter or not it takes 2 to tango so if one gives into weakness of lust doesn't mean he /she cheated you or who ever.
Not agreeing with the practice but in our day and age women are as quick as men to explore and lets face it no matter what guys do the women ultimately decide if it happens, otherwise it would be criminal

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