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The Continuing Chronicles of the FNG(irl): My First Night Call
I'm not a morning person. I never have been, I never will be. I like to roam with the creatures of the night.
Fact of the matter is that I do my best thinking,writing, meditating and brainstorming in the very wee hours of the morning. Unfortunately for me (or for my coworkers depending on your perspective) my nocturnal habits don't mesh so well with my work schedule.
In order to arrive at my desk on time ( I use airline schedules when I state that I was "on time"--that gives me about an hour's leeway), I need to be up (meaning vertical), showered, dressed and out the door by 7:25 a.m.
If you've never met me, you may not be aware that I have a lot of hair. I mean a LOT of hair. It's on the longish side, and it's thicker than a McDonald's milkshake. It takes me at minimum 20 minutes with a professional strength blow-dryer to get all the moisture out. I COULD go to work with my hair wet, or damp, but I don't want to frighten old ladies, dogs and small children with my Roseanne Rosannadanna coiffure.
This means that I have to drag my sorry butt out of my comfy bed at 6:00 am, (snooze button) 6:10 a.m. (snooze button) 6:20 a.m. (ok, one foot's on the floor) 6:30 a.m. (SHIT!!! I'm late!! --mad dash for the shower). I don't enjoy this morning ritual, but I can't seem to go from alarm buzzer to bathroom in one easy step.
The POINT of all this is that I don't wake gracefully if woken early (there's an exception to this rule, but it's not for public consumption). In high school my friends would call and if still abed and my parents volunteered to rouse me, the usual response was "NO!!, for the love of humanity, don't wake her!!"
So I went to bed last night fairly early and conked out quickly, which is an anamoly. My pager, the volume of which is set on "stun", went off at approximately 1:00 a.m.
This is how it went down:
"DEEDLE DEEDLE DEEDLE!!!!"
Wha? WTF?? My eyes pop open, heart slamming in my ribcage....holy crap, those are MY tones....make wild grab for light switch behind my bed, knocking over said lamp and breaking it in the process. Right the lamp and turn it on, make valiant effort to leap out of bed in a single bound.
My adrenaline fueled legs become hopelessly entangled in the sheets and comforter, which my brain does not acknowledge (my brain is still on a beach in Hawaii getting a well-oiled rubdown) and I vault into a "half-pike with a full twist" face -plant onto my bedroom floor, trailing the twisted remains of my bedding behind me.
I've now spent a full 60 seconds extricating myself from my Venus Flytrap bed, and realize I've blown any chance of putting on Big Girl clothing, so I jam my slippers on my feet (can't find my shoes) and grab my pager, keys and coat and gallop down the stairs (waking all my neighbors en route no doubt) in my nighttime regalia (colorful jammie pants and wifebeater tee)...
I hop in my car like Burt Reynolds in a Smoky and the Bandit movie (PUT ON MY SEATBELT) and screech off up the road to the department. At this juncture approximately three minutes has elapsed, I haven't blinked yet, and I don't remember exhaling. I pull in ahead of a couple of other members, we all dash to the bay and begin the Turnout Chinese Fire Drill. As we're running to the truck, we get the announcment--false auto alarm, business owner on site and calling off the alarm.
Dejected, I put my gear back, sign in on the sheet, say my good nights and head home.
Swell, it's now 1:30 and I am WIDE AWAKE....I've had a nap and an adrenaline surge, and I'm ready to take on King Kong....but I have to be up in 4.5 hours.
One hour of restless channel flipping and pacing later, I force myself to lie down and count backward from one million (and somewhere in the dark recesses of my twisted brain, I'm hoping that the tones drop again since I'm already awake).
Until next time....
Fact of the matter is that I do my best thinking,writing, meditating and brainstorming in the very wee hours of the morning. Unfortunately for me (or for my coworkers depending on your perspective) my nocturnal habits don't mesh so well with my work schedule.
In order to arrive at my desk on time ( I use airline schedules when I state that I was "on time"--that gives me about an hour's leeway), I need to be up (meaning vertical), showered, dressed and out the door by 7:25 a.m.
If you've never met me, you may not be aware that I have a lot of hair. I mean a LOT of hair. It's on the longish side, and it's thicker than a McDonald's milkshake. It takes me at minimum 20 minutes with a professional strength blow-dryer to get all the moisture out. I COULD go to work with my hair wet, or damp, but I don't want to frighten old ladies, dogs and small children with my Roseanne Rosannadanna coiffure.
This means that I have to drag my sorry butt out of my comfy bed at 6:00 am, (snooze button) 6:10 a.m. (snooze button) 6:20 a.m. (ok, one foot's on the floor) 6:30 a.m. (SHIT!!! I'm late!! --mad dash for the shower). I don't enjoy this morning ritual, but I can't seem to go from alarm buzzer to bathroom in one easy step.
The POINT of all this is that I don't wake gracefully if woken early (there's an exception to this rule, but it's not for public consumption). In high school my friends would call and if still abed and my parents volunteered to rouse me, the usual response was "NO!!, for the love of humanity, don't wake her!!"
So I went to bed last night fairly early and conked out quickly, which is an anamoly. My pager, the volume of which is set on "stun", went off at approximately 1:00 a.m.
This is how it went down:
"DEEDLE DEEDLE DEEDLE!!!!"
Wha? WTF?? My eyes pop open, heart slamming in my ribcage....holy crap, those are MY tones....make wild grab for light switch behind my bed, knocking over said lamp and breaking it in the process. Right the lamp and turn it on, make valiant effort to leap out of bed in a single bound.
My adrenaline fueled legs become hopelessly entangled in the sheets and comforter, which my brain does not acknowledge (my brain is still on a beach in Hawaii getting a well-oiled rubdown) and I vault into a "half-pike with a full twist" face -plant onto my bedroom floor, trailing the twisted remains of my bedding behind me.
I've now spent a full 60 seconds extricating myself from my Venus Flytrap bed, and realize I've blown any chance of putting on Big Girl clothing, so I jam my slippers on my feet (can't find my shoes) and grab my pager, keys and coat and gallop down the stairs (waking all my neighbors en route no doubt) in my nighttime regalia (colorful jammie pants and wifebeater tee)...
I hop in my car like Burt Reynolds in a Smoky and the Bandit movie (PUT ON MY SEATBELT) and screech off up the road to the department. At this juncture approximately three minutes has elapsed, I haven't blinked yet, and I don't remember exhaling. I pull in ahead of a couple of other members, we all dash to the bay and begin the Turnout Chinese Fire Drill. As we're running to the truck, we get the announcment--false auto alarm, business owner on site and calling off the alarm.
Dejected, I put my gear back, sign in on the sheet, say my good nights and head home.
Swell, it's now 1:30 and I am WIDE AWAKE....I've had a nap and an adrenaline surge, and I'm ready to take on King Kong....but I have to be up in 4.5 hours.
One hour of restless channel flipping and pacing later, I force myself to lie down and count backward from one million (and somewhere in the dark recesses of my twisted brain, I'm hoping that the tones drop again since I'm already awake).
Until next time....
Add a Comment
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Comment by Mary Ellen Shea on March 4, 2008 at 10:50pm
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Thanks Robert.....I was an adrenaline junkie long before joining the fire service...now I'm with like-minded people...:)
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Comment by Bob on March 4, 2008 at 10:40pm
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Great story very relateable, keep them coming. No doubt over time you will get more oganized, learn the selective reset ("Oh we had a call last night?"), and love the rush. I guess I was luck to be able to come home crawl back in bed and be back to sleep before my wife. Keep up the good work.
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Tanks Jim---
PS....keep pushing that class---I haven't seen Granville signed up yet...time to start bugging Sal Rizzo.
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Comment by Jim Brunelle Jr. on March 4, 2008 at 10:10pm
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lol, as time passes you will start "setting your self up" for calls at night,socks on top of the sneakers,sweatshirt at the foot of the bed, keys, pager &cell phone grouped together,vehicle backed into the driveway, and never get below 1/2 tank of gas,(at least since I became a chief), yes I ran out on the scene once,just once! all these little thing will save you time, but like said before, just wait for the big one! Then you forget your name for a quick instant.. You'll do fine. and if your as good at being a firefighter as you are at writting you'll get along super. Be Safe out there!
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Comment by LadyChaplain on March 4, 2008 at 9:15pm
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Ted... it doesn't take years to get that skill... I've got it already :-) I don't wake up until we're on scene... don't ask me how I got to the call though lol.
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Comment by Engineco913 on March 4, 2008 at 9:09pm
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Hey your already above the curve!!! A lot of times in the middle of the night most roll over, reset the pager and go back to bed. :)
Yet another great story. When I was a jr at my first call....Wait a minute this could be a blog post of my own someday :):)
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Comment by Joe Stoltz on March 4, 2008 at 8:30pm
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LOL! No, he isn't teleporting... you're DAWDLING.
It's just like putting on the gear in 2 minutes - practice, practice, practice.
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lol.....
I want to know how the President of our org (who lives across the street from me and has a solid 20 years on me) manages to get to the dept. and the radio in 60 seconds.
Is he teleporting?
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Ohhhhh Mel.... I enjoy your stories so much :-) Just you wait 'til you get the BIG one at 2am.... that's going to be a call you'll never forget.
Personally, my bed has never held me hostage. I'm lucky like that lol. But I do have the reputation of "dozing" in the back of 7-1 during late night EMS calls... well, during EMS calls at any time of the day actually haha. I luck out though, people ask me how I get to the firehouse so quick and I tell them it's because I don't open my eyes... I just autopilot to the firehall and HOPE that there aren't any deer in my way during that 27 second trek.
:-P Probie
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