I’ll post a blog about my boot camp experiences later, after my thoughts have been published in The Volunteer Firefighter magazine, so stay tuned for that.

I participated in drill night with my department this week and I never cease to be amazed at how many ways I can find to make a complete ass of myself.
It’s astonishing really. Disturbing, but astonishing. At least this week’s antics didn’t feature any eight-legged crawlies.

I’m still on vacation, so I spent the morning at the gym, followed by a visit to the town pool, where I swam about a mile in laps, and then spent the rest of the afternoon flipping an eight year old up and into the water with my interlaced hands. Those of you with kids or those of you like me who don’t have our own so we act like overgrown five year olds while minding them, know that one lofted flip into the water is NEVER enough. About 100 flips later “Do it AGAIN!!! “AGAIN” ….my arms were like spaghetti noodles and my shoulders were on fire.

I ran home to change and get to the station in time for drill, fervently praying that we would be doing something relatively easy because at that point all I wanted to do was lay down on the floor and go to sleep.

Chief strolled out in the meeting room and said “We’ve got a busy night ahead for you guys; split into teams and we’re going to run some timed practice drills with ladders, hoses and pumps; with luck we’ll be done by 9:00 p.m.”.

Right. No rest for the wicked or the overgrown five-year-olds.

We geared up and I ended up on our Pierce with one of our pump op/drivers/, and one of our captains in the front seat, with me and four other probies plus one of our more experienced guys in the back.

We were to complete three stations, as quickly as humanly possible, while being timed for our efforts, competing against the other drill participants on the Hahn and the brush truck (you can only seat four on the Hahn). The other trucks had two probies and six of the senior guys. Stacking the deck? Maybe, but for me, that just lit the competitive fire.

Station 1 consisted of laddering the two story town garage, hauling the K12 saw up with a rope both on the ladder and from the roof, getting it started and then putting everything back on the truck…..Properly. We’d actually use the saw for practice vent cuts later, but not as part of the regular drill.

This is when we found out just how many of the probies had a fear of heights. I don’t love heights…but I’m ok as long as the ladder is set up properly. I’m not about to perform any dance moves on the roof, but I’m comfortable enough to do the job up there. Two guys pulled the ladder and got it set up. Our Asst. Chief says “Who’s going up?” I stick my hand in the air and look around and just about EVERYONE that I’m riding with is staring off into space. Finally one kid reluctantly stepped forward and said quietly to me “let me go first and get it over with”. I stepped back and footed the ladder and up he goes. I nod to one of the guys to stand at the base and up I go. Perfect. Uh, well, no, not quite. I get to the top, look down and see our driver staring up at me holding the rope and grinning. Right. D’oh. Forgot the rope. Back down I go and back up with the rope. I make a loop knot and send it back down over the edge. They tie off the saw and as I’m pulling it up I can feel myself being pulled off balance, so I tell my fellow probie to grab my feet. “What for?” I turned around and said “So that I don’t pull a swan dive over the edge” and he swallowed and said “Oh, ok”. Up comes the saw, we get it started and down we go.

Station 2 was routine; tapping the hydrant, setting up the pump, filling a container and pumping it out. Easy stuff.

Station 3 was more of the same…driving into the village, tapping the hydrant, pulling the 4” hose off for supply, pulling the 1.5” hose and sending a spray into the woods and vacant field, while two others manned the deck gun. All was going fine until we realized that the supply line and the attack line were looped up together (of course both lines were already charged) so we man the supply line, pick it up and start backing up to straighten it out. That’s when I pulled my second “D’Oh” moment of the night. Buried in the grass behind me as I backed up was a fairly large tree branch. Never saw it, even as I was checking the ground behind me to make sure I didn’t fall over/into anything. Next thing I know my arms are windmilling and back and down I go, like a tasered turtle. KERSPLASH!!!! Because not only did I fall straight onto my back, there was about four inches of water from our hoses creating a swamp where I fell. And now I’m pinned down by the supply line. When my fellow members collected themselves enough to stop laughing (or at least to laugh silently with their backs turned) they pulled the hose off me and I crawled out and then opted to go play with the deck gun for a while.

Time-wise, considering the number of new recruits we had on board vs. the other team, we didn’t do badly at all. The hose entanglement cost us a precious 30 seconds to straighten out, but if it hadn’t been for that, we would have been right there with the other team.

I hope my bunkers dry out some time soon.

Stay safe, train often, until next time…….