I am wondering how does everyone keep themselves strong and resilient against all the stressors and traumas that you encounter in the course of doing your emergency service jobs?

 

How do you stay emotionally present and nurturing while keeping yourself sane?

 

What skills have you developed to make yourself more flexible internally?

 

I am also wondering what skills you utilize to help keep those around you strong and resilient?

 

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Have a very good friend of mine who joined the same time I did.We've been friends forever and I was able to help him out of a couple situations he wasn't dealing very well with by talking to him about it.I know it helped him out a lot both times and I'm really glad I could be there for him then.Now that I've got a white hat I want our folks to be able to vent on me as well as talk to me if something is bothering them.
I've been in that situation too with having to restrain somebody.That is hard to do.Always tried to get them out of the immediate area and talk to them.Have 2 or 3 calls that happened years ago and still stand out in my mind.It definitely isn't all wine and roses in this profession,that's for sure.Just try to do the best we can every time we go out the door.
Golf, aye... I never pictured you strolling the greens... good to know...

So how often to you get to play?
Do you play with a group of friends... and vent as your play?

I have never been able to wrap my mind around golf, apparently I don't relax well enough ;-)
yeah, sometimes we all may be taken off guard by what can bug us... and it might be something new that has never bothered us before... since people change as they age and as they have new experiences... we just have to address it when it happens...

there is just horrible stuff that happens in life... and in our lines of work... that no one EVER should have to see or experience...

and it is human to feel and say "that is horrible and I wish I never saw that"


Ralph - LOL - a lady trooper punched you
hee hee - that will entertain me for months ;-)
I have discovered one of the greatest gifts I have is short-term memory. Unless someone specifically triggers a past situation, I can not list off all the details as some of you do with your super memories.

While it use to bug me "why can't I remember the name of that person that died in that accident, etc" now as I have aged (i mean, seasoned), and have seen more than I ever wanted to see in my entire life, I appreciate more being able to let things go and I work hard at finding a way to properly catalog and integrate anything that sticks around to bug me.

Thanks for everyone's input.
Patti, that sounds like a tough call. Do you know what in particular made this call so complicated?

Young suicides always tended to bother me more than older suicides. I guess my personal beliefs now are headed towards supporting euthanasia as an option after I have seen a lot of people suffer in their end stages of life.
yes, I personally believe in life after death (a heaven) so it absolutely has helped me over the years to see life here on Earth as one stage of life. This has especially helped with kid deaths.

I know some cultures even celebrate at the time of death as a passing from one life stage into the next. In my experience, it seems the U.S. primarily grieves and is sad the time of a person's death. But I guess the older I get, the more I realize I feel sad for me and those still alive and the missing of my interactions with the person who died, rather than feeling sad THAT a person died.

I believe in God, but struggle with why God would let people suffer - physically and emotionally - here on Earth. But I also believe that God created us to help each other and care for each other.

Thanks everyone for your input.
Yes, the "I did everything I could" has brought me peace too.

And subsequently, when I question my decisions or felt something could have been done better, it bothers me.

Thanks for your input.
It was my first. The site, smell.... I can handle just about anything but this one just stuck.
so aggression - LOLOLOLOL - kidding

poor little white ball.... LOL

yes, i like physical sports - volleyball, waterskiing, downhill snow skiing - I am not much good at strolling... like across a golf course... but I could drive the cart for you and serve you drinks ;-)

but you make is sound exciting if you get to take it out on the ball - I think I do that in softball ;-)
yes, i can't do smell - that sticks in my mind too.

makes me glad I am not a CSI - they do (smell) that every day

we had one young guy that attempted suicide 5 x's that we picked up each time... before he completed his suicide just prior to our arrival...

I was pissed because they kept letting him out of the psych hospital. I felt like if someone were taking better care of this young man in the rest of his life... he would never have completed his suicide... and I would never have had to see or smell it...

That memory stuck with me and serves me in my workload now as a social worker. I am committed to use what I have learned to help others who are that distraught with life.
You have to find your own personal coping mechanism...Foe me, I like to use humor. BUT, you have to know when and where to use it. Obviously you don't make sick jokes or offhanded remarks around the public or family members but you would be amazed at the one liners that get told out of sight so to speak. The burn patient that is either a regular or extra crispy... the person that has fallen and needs assistence "Help I've fallen and I can't get up." Or old "Seizure Mary". Sick...? Yes, but it works for many and that's all that matters...if you don't find something then you won't last in this field very long...we get to see people at their best and at their worst.
Thank you Heather.

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