so sad

For the longest time since i moved from California in 1999 I had been trying to find my best friend that i was in kindergarten all the way up until i moved well about a few weeks ago i found a girl i went to school with at Conyer Elementary and i was talkin to her about my friend amy meek and asked her how she was and what not and she told me that in the 8th grade she died in a car accident with her grandpa I was completely devastated i still am i still cant believe she is gone i wish i hadnt moved when we did so that way i could have at least been there with her up until 8th grade and gone to the funeral to say bye to her. She was my only true friend in school. Hearing that she was gone it was like i lost a part of me, its weird cuz i held on to our friendship for so many years and then to find out that she is gone shattered my heart. We used to do the craziest things together i remember for her birthday me, her, and 3 other girls dressed up like the spice girls and what not it was so funny. we always had slumber parties and hung out together she was the only person that i ever talked about my mom to. I cant even remember when my mom and dad actually split up cuz i was really young but i never talked to anyone about it or how i felt or what not but when her and i became friends i would tell her everything. Her and i would talk about our wedding and how we would be each others maid of honor and what not and how many kids we would have, what we wanted in our husbands all kinds of stuff like that and i really did want her to be my maid of honor when i got married and my kids' god mother but God had other plans for her. As i look back when i was in school i got made fun of ALOT all day everyday dont really know why or what not but i did and she was the only person that stood by my side no matter what. I honestly l think she was sent from heaven to be there for me in school and watch over me. I dont know its weird but i really do think that i miss her so much! I wish my kids could have met her b/c she is the most wonderful person she is the kindest loving person. If i could change ANYTHING in life it would be the car accident that took my best friend away i would make it so that they were never driving so she could be here with me. I never truly knew what a best friend was until i met her! She would drop everything to be there for me and i would do that same for her. THIS IS THE HARDEST THING FOR ME TO DEAL WITH. I MISS YOU AMY AND I LOVE YOU FOR ALWAYS BEING THERE FOR ME WHEN NO ONE ELSE WAS. R.I.P. LOTS OF LOVE TO YOU FROM ME AND MY FAMILY WISH YOU WERE HERE.

so sad

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