I've tried writing this blog a couple of times & something always happens. In one of the groups I am subscribed to: Female Firefightrs a couple young ladies are having some issues with anti-female sentiment and discrimination. I know too that new fire fighters get picked on even if they are not women. It the nature of the "brotherhood". I read a blog titled Men are from Mars & women are from the continental US that made me giggle & think.
When I wanted to join the FD as a jr back in the 70s it hurt because I was excluded from something because of my sex but that is how it was & no body ever thought to CHALLENGE that @ the time, definitely not me, my uncle was the chief & he would have skinned me alive had I brought anything negative to the department. Girls just couldn't be fire fighters. So it took me another 10 yrs to be accepted. In most areas today it is a common thing for members to be female & to have girls as jr members. Women tend to come & go through our dept & although we have had as many as 7 or 8 women on the roster @ once, it seems like I end up sitting in the meeting room as the only woman in the room not to mention often the oldest person chronologically & in senority. (I sound like a dinosaur)
One issue I have had with other women myself is that some of women are only in the fire station to be around the fire men. OK OK I know but it IS the truth!! So they worry about how they look & they act really cute & flirt & well you know where I'm going with this. I've had little private conversations with a few ladies over the years who seemed intent to set some of us back several years. A few of them stayed & have been excellent fire fighters. Some didn't stay. As a matter of fact 1 young lady was very dangerously playing 2 of our younger guys against eachother. I told her to leave. When I was called into the chief's office I explained. I told him he could talk to her & find out if she wanted to be a firefighter or if she wanted to stir trouble with my guys. She didn't come back & they figured it out for themselves & they continuted to be best buds.
Then there are women who do want to be fire fighters but think they should be excluded from parts of it because they are women. ??? Ok, I'm 5'4" tall. Sometimes it is difficult for me to reach the ladder but we work on a buddy system & that works out. When you are given a task you know you can't get done on your own tell them you need a partner or grab someone to do it with. (like lifitng a generator or rehab box or whatever)
My Chief who taught me a lot about life in general had a few things to say that helped me out & sometimes I find myself thinking about them still. He said:
*A headache, cramps or PMS doesn't impress anyone. If you can't deal with the stuff you need to deal with stay home & recouperate. *The guys don't need to worry about you being OK. They don't have time to hold your hand when you are scared. (or anyone elses) *Sometimes the job stinks for the us too, if you can't hold up your end, don't try. Let someone who can get it done & get out of there do it. *You don't have to act like a man but men are men & that's how they are. *If you can't take the heat, get out of the fire house. We aren't putting curtians on the windows & NOBODY puts the seat down!! *Broken nails & dirty hands are part of the territory. *Firefighting is a Good Old Boys Club. You can fit in & be comfortable but you cant make it a woman's world, don't even try. *When you are mad, irritated & frustrated, don't stand there screaming & crying & stomping your feet. Say what you need to say, & walk away calmly. (sometimes you have to give them time to think about it) When you get home treat yourself to a good cry & a bubble bath & then get your butt back out there next time & do your stuff.
Some of that sounds a little krass but I knew what he meant & I've been here a long time so maybe he had a point.
Jen
You need to be a member of My Firefighter Nation to add comments!
Join My Firefighter Nation