The Social Network & Community JUST for Firefighters
Inter-department Relationships
I was just wondering what everyone's views are on the topic of relationships between members of the same department. It seems to me that so long as both individuals remain appropriate at appropriate times (ie meetings, formal functions, PR events, calls) that there sould not and should not be an issue. Granted, issues of any rank differences may ultimately cause discussion, but assuming both indivuals are of the same rank and are not allowing themselves to be continually distracted at times when attention is required, are there issues?
Does anyone's department have SOPs or SOGs or even By-Laws prohibiting such actions, or adding restrictions and guidelines to those that are on the same dept and in relationships?
Does anyone's department have SOPs or SOGs or even By-Laws prohibiting such actions, or adding restrictions and guidelines to those that are on the same dept and in relationships?
Replies to This Discussion
-
Permalink Reply by FETC on
-
I appreciate the fact that many here have a significant other within the department. And mature attitudes and minds do go a long way, but with that said I can name about 10 more bad ending relationships as compared to the few like minded individuals who can remain professional.
I went to look for the "sex in the Firehouse" forum and I can't seem to find it. I also DISLIKE the fact that anytime there is the slightest issue here at FFN the webchief makes the forum go bye-bye... hence Sex in the Firehouse or P vs V.
Many of us here have spent too much time, trying to explain what previous brothers have suffered through, to not have someone pull the plug... so I am going to take a break from this website because it isn't worth my time to come back one day later and continually see the hardwork of many disappear.
All I can say on this issue is this, (I am not re-typing the two page reply I had in the other forum) Bad breakups, marriages or divorces are career ending suicide for fire chief's when accusations fly, (whether true or false), when Chief's or Officer's look away and do nothing, or god forbid, someone cries foul to the law or the media... Been there done that or seen it from nearby departments, but all of them have ruined many good firefighters and fire officers careers.
Everyone would be better off without ANY sex, inter-personal relationships and/or dating from within the same firehouse. Date someone from another house that is OK, but the internal part needs to remain all business / all the time.
Signing off...
-
Permalink Reply by BillySFCVFD on
-
Reading this post I can't help but think of a saying I heard. "Don't crap where you eat". I'm sure that is true often but not always, though literally always . TCSS
-
Permalink Reply by sweetfire203 on
-
As far as i know our department does not have any policies against it. Both me and my husband were both on at the same time. ( recently due to work he got taken off the department). The point is even if your married and on the same department it needs to be kept professional. Now when the station has family get togethers and such of course things are a little different but it is still kept at a minimum. As far as dating i have seen it go both bad and good with people datining on the same department as long as things are kept in a professional manner by both parties i dont see anything wrong.
-
-
What happened to "opposites attract"? TCSS
-
Permalink Reply by Yee on
-
hmmm good question, but only a firefighter is going to understand why you have to call off a date or will be late to one because they have been put through the same situation.
-
-
I'm married but if I wasn't I wouldn't date someone that wouldn't understand that. Well maybe I would if she was real pretty. No wait, that wouldn't work either. Just dirty dreaming and besides my wife is really pretty and she does understand, not happy always, but understands. If she was a FF I think we would argue about what the best tactics are. LOL Thanks for your reply. TCSS
-
Permalink Reply by Aaron Wepking on
-
Thank you everyone for the input. I have come to the conclusion that a relationship could work in any situationso long as both parties are mature about it but that comes on an individual basis between the parties. Some just cant figure out what they want or how to handle it.
-
Permalink Reply by Beth on
-
my views on this topic is that i see nothing wrong with it.. the reason i say this is b/c im with someone in my dept. and everything is going great.. there are other people in our dept. that are together but when i look at them they are always showing to much PDA as some of you have said in your point of view. I think that should be brought to attention or they should be asked to not do it at teh station. b/c if someone comes in to see how things are goin in the dept. and they see taht then what's the outside people that arn't in teh dept. goin to say.. it could hurt your dept b/c people could go around saying that they were at your station and they saw a few couples showing all this PDA instead of actually paying attention. Your there to learn not cut up and play. you can do taht outside the station. I mean yea its ok if u just want to kiss or hug someone but just don't overdue yourself. Well i know some of you may say that what i wrote is wrong but hey its the truth and people look at you as role models and you have kids that look up to you as well. So again what i wrote is my personal opinion noone has to agree but there has to be lines drawed at the station and no it does not matter if u date anyone from your dept. If you love or like that person then noone can stop you and i haven't seen any law that says two people in one dept can't be together.. well thats enough said from me.. Maybe some of you get my point maybe some of you don't but its ok.. my opinions!!
-
Permalink Reply by Robin Inman on
-
I have to disagree with Yee on this, if two people are truly commited to each other they learn to understand each others jobs, the good and the bad of them. That's what being together with someone is all about, it's about being a team and being friends. You don't have to do exactly the same thing as another person to be able to understand what they do and why they do it. You just have to be willing to be open minded, truly learn about their job and understand the ups and downs of it, just as they should with your job.
-
-
My day job is working for the State of Alaska. My husband and I both work for the same employer but in different departments, our son-in-law also works at the same place. So employer wide family members can be employed they just can't work in the same department.....also one cannot supervise the other. That seems appropriate to me because it can cause problems with each other, because as a couple you should be a team working together...neither one in charge. But if one becomes a supervisor to the other then I could see where resentment may come into play sometimes, plus if the relationship or marriage didn't work out being in the same department or one supervising the other could get really messy. Where as if they worked for a different department the fallout wouldn't be so bad. Plus others in the department might feel that the supervisors significant other were getting preferential treatment. Or on the other hand the supervisor might be harder on their significant other trying to show others that they are being fair. So bottom line I think couples should be able to work for the same employer just in a different deparmtent or at a different station. I realize in small towns or in volunteer departments this my not be possible sometimes, but it's better to be safe than sorry.
-
Permalink Reply by Engineco913 on
-
We don't have any SOP's against it. We do however have a bunch of experience with issues that have come from terminated relationships. Hard feelings and petty bs occurs then and it's just not worth it. I have seen the department lose both sides of the couple due to a failed relationship with each other.
This also really only becomes an issue in NON-married couples. (even though married couples have their own share of issues at times)
- ‹ Previous
- 1
- 2
- 3
- Next ›
© 2024 Created by Firefighter Nation WebChief.
Powered by
