to make you laugh

A college teacher reminds her class of tomorrow's final exam. 'Now class,
I won't tolerate any excuses for you not being here tomorrow. I might
consider a nuclear attack or a serious personal injury, illness, or a death
in your immediate family, but that's it, no other excuses whatsoever!' A
smart-ass student in the back of the room raised his hand and asked, 'What
would you say if tomorrow I said I was suffering from complete and utter
sexual exhaustion?' The entire class is reduced to laughter and snickering
When silence was restored, the teacher smiled knowingly at the student,
shook her head and sweetly said, 'Well, I guess you'd have to write the exam
with your other hand.'

Dad at the Mall


I took my dad to the mall the other day to buy some new shoes (he is 92). We decided to grab a bite at the food court.

I noticed he was watching a teenager sitting next to him.

The teenager had spiked hair in all different colors: green, red, orange, and blue.


My dad kept staring at him. The teenager would look and find him staring every time.


When the teenager had had enough, he sarcastically asked, 'What's the matter old man, never done anything wild in your life?'


Knowing my Dad, I quickly swallowed my food so that I would not choke on his response, knowing he would have a good one, and in

classic style he did not bat an eye in his response.


'Got drunk once, and had sex with a peacock. I was just wondering if you were my son.'

Hey Billy

Thanks for the add.

tcss
Mark

Thank you for your comment.


MyHotComments

Thanks for the support. We have a Deputy Chief (not 144truck) who's big on the facial hair issue. The closed eyes is just not being used to posing in front of my own camera. I just bought it after the house sold in Nov.

Hey Billy, In regards to dress attire for the greater Los Angeles and Southern California area, always come prepared with a tank top, pair of shorts, and flip flops. As we speak it's a comfortable 73˚F and it's noon. Also, keep in mind that last week in a period of 4-days, over 1.4 million acres burned and took out over 800 residences. It's more than likely going to remain the same... no rain and continued sunshine. Cheers, Mike

This is one of the reasons why the latest fires did not burn to the ocean. Los Angeles County Fire Department Blackhawk Attack Helicopters converted for firefighting OPS. This also includes the use of night vision and FLIR which enabled copters to attack the head of the fire, hot spots and structures in totally insane conditions.

Yes Billy the girls here wear bikinis all year round. I must send you some photos that should bring a smile to your face and a litle warmth to your heart.
How is the weather over there at the moment?

Same here in Southwest Va quiet . just taking EMT Class

math911.wmv (1

Hope all is going well
man walks into a pet store and is looking around when he
> > spots a Chimpanzee in a cage marked, "$1000". The
> > man looks a little closer and discovers that the chimpanzee
> > is wearing a T-shirt bearing the
> > Maltese Cross and is cleaning a fog nozzle. Curious about
> > this, the man summons the storekeeper and asks him what the
> > deal is with this thousand dollar monkey. "Sir, You
> > have discovered our Fire Service Monkeys".
> >
> >
> > This one is our Firefighter version. It has a Basic
> > Firefighters certification with IFSAC seals, is also a
> > Licensed Paramedic, can perform vehicle extrications, high
> > angle rescue and is up to date on current CPR standards. A
> > very good value for a thousand dollars.
> >
> >
> >
> > The man is suitably impressed and moves to the next cage,
> > which is occupied by a gorilla - also wearing the same
> > T-shirt, but is gnawing on a pen and reading training
> > manuals.
> >
> >
> >
> > The storekeeper states, "Sir, You have discovered the
> > Captain model.This one has an Advanced Firefighter
> > certification, is capable of training the other monkeys in
> > basic firefighting skills, and can manage any emergency
> > scene. It can also type. A very good value for five-
> > thousand, Sir."
> >
> >
> >
> > Impressed, the man moves to the last cage. Inside, he finds
> > an orangutan, dressed in a white shirt and a tie, but
> > holding only a coffee cup. The man says, "What does
> > this one do that he's worth $10,000 ?"
> >
> >
> > The storekeeper clears his throat and says, "Ah, sir,
> > well, um. we have never actually seen him do anything except
> > drink coffee and play with himself, but he says he's a
> > Battalion Chief."
>
>



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Hi Bill, how are you? Greetings from Barbados - lookin forward to corresponding with you here at FFN. You may also find me here:
www.emergency-services.org/fire

thank you for the comment got home from the hospital they took out my portacath.So now just get my strength back and then back to work.

yea but thats a lot of rust i should just sand it real good right, look at the rust on that thing

Thanks for the comment. Joe and Brenda are great friends of mine and my husband's, Curtis. I hope you have a great weekend. Keep in touch!

No its really more of an IAFF versus Volunteers thing. The volunteer departments here are considered to be basically a cleanup crew for the career guys. I have learned that as long as we have to depend on the county for everything, then we will be waiting for A loooonnnnggg time. So we are beginning to do things for ourselves. Our chief still thinks he is the only one in the department and is hopelessly tied to the dependence mentality. He has no real idea about how to be a chief but would probably make a good firefighter, if he can learn some teamwork. He is a haole too, not too many native hawaiians in our department, maybe 25% of the membership. Hard to attract volunteers when the economy is so bad.

To some extent we are all rookies, or at least we should act that way. There is always something you can learn, if there isn't you become a danger to your company. For example, my chief is too busy being John Wayne to worry about where his helmet is or what muck it floats above, he thinks there is no more to his job that being the only one of us that knows how to knock fire, and I hope he resigns before he gets one of us killed.

Why there are Firefighters

God made Firefighters so cops could have hero's!

Hello there. Things have been about the same here couple grass fires not sure about medical asst. none from the time I get home till I go to work anyway. I hope you get you shed finished before winter. Bet you can. Glad things are fine there, Things are good here. Joe and I are fine.Have a bike rally in Jefferson next saturday, should be fun if not cold. Take care and be safe.

haha, yeah i thought about that, but i figured most people dont read it.. ill change it when i can