My Firefighter Nation
Only a Southerner Knows - Reference for those above the Mason/Dixon line
THis is just cute & I had to pass it along. I had a chat with someone the other day who said I sounded VERY SOUTHERN. Ok, Southern OHIO. I was @ a class once where 1 instructor was from New York & the other from North Carolina. I understand both languages.
Only a Southerner knows the difference between a hissie fit and a conniption fit, and that you don't "HAVE" them, you "PITCH" them.
Only a Southerner knows how many fish, collard greens, turnip greens, peas, beans, etc., make up "a mess."
Only a Southerner can show or point out to you the general direction of "yonder."
Only a Southerner knows exactly how long "directly" is, . as in: "Going to town, be back directly."
Even Southern babies know that "Gimme some sugar" is not a request for the white, granular sweet substance that sits in a pretty little bowl in the middle of the table.
All Southerners know exactly when "by and by" is. They might not use the term, but they know the concept well.
Only a Southerner knows instinctively that the best gesture of solace for a neighbor who's got trouble is a plate of hot fried chicken and a big bowl of cold potato salad. If the neighbor's trouble is a real crisis, they also know to add a large banana puddin!
Only Southerners grow up knowing the difference between "right near" and "a right far piece." They also know that "just down the road" can be 1 mile or 20.
Only a Southerner, both knows and understands, the difference between a redneck, a good ol' boy, and po' white trash.
A Southerner knows that "fixin" can be used as a noun, a verb, or an adverb.
Only Southerners make friends while standing in lines, ... and when we're "in line," . we talk to everybody!
Put 100 Southerners in a room and half of them will discover they're related, even if only by marriage.
In the South, y'all is singular, all y'all is plural.
Southerners know grits come from corn and how to eat them.
Every Southerner knows tomatoes with eggs, bacon, grits, and coffee are perfectly wonderful breakfast foods; that red eye gravy is also a breakfast food; and that fried green tomatoes are not a breakfast food.
When you hear someone say, "Well, I caught myself lookin'," you know you are in the presence of a genuine Southerner!
Only true Southerners say "sweet tea" and "sweet milk." Sweet tea indicates the need for sugar and lots of it -- we do not like our tea unsweetened. "Sweet milk" means you don't want buttermilk.
And a true Southerner knows you don't scream obscenities at little old ladies who drive 30 MPH on the freeway. You just say,"Bless her heart" ... and go your own way.
To those of you who are still a little embarrassed by your Southerness: Take two tent revivals and a dose of sausage gravy and call me in the morning. Bless your heart!
And to those of you who are still having a hard time understanding all this Southern stuff, ... bless your hearts, I hear they are fixin' to have classes on Southernness as a second language!
And for those that are not from the South but have lived here for a long time, all y'all need a sign to hang on y'alls front porch that reads "I ain't from the South, but I got here as fast as I could."
Southern girls know men may come and go, but friends are fahevah !
Now...... Shugah, send this to someone who was raised in the South or wish they had been!
If you're a Northern transplant, Bless your little heart, fake it.
We know y'all got here as fast as y'all could
Only a Southerner knows the difference between a hissie fit and a conniption fit, and that you don't "HAVE" them, you "PITCH" them.
Only a Southerner knows how many fish, collard greens, turnip greens, peas, beans, etc., make up "a mess."
Only a Southerner can show or point out to you the general direction of "yonder."
Only a Southerner knows exactly how long "directly" is, . as in: "Going to town, be back directly."
Even Southern babies know that "Gimme some sugar" is not a request for the white, granular sweet substance that sits in a pretty little bowl in the middle of the table.
All Southerners know exactly when "by and by" is. They might not use the term, but they know the concept well.
Only a Southerner knows instinctively that the best gesture of solace for a neighbor who's got trouble is a plate of hot fried chicken and a big bowl of cold potato salad. If the neighbor's trouble is a real crisis, they also know to add a large banana puddin!
Only Southerners grow up knowing the difference between "right near" and "a right far piece." They also know that "just down the road" can be 1 mile or 20.
Only a Southerner, both knows and understands, the difference between a redneck, a good ol' boy, and po' white trash.
A Southerner knows that "fixin" can be used as a noun, a verb, or an adverb.
Only Southerners make friends while standing in lines, ... and when we're "in line," . we talk to everybody!
Put 100 Southerners in a room and half of them will discover they're related, even if only by marriage.
In the South, y'all is singular, all y'all is plural.
Southerners know grits come from corn and how to eat them.
Every Southerner knows tomatoes with eggs, bacon, grits, and coffee are perfectly wonderful breakfast foods; that red eye gravy is also a breakfast food; and that fried green tomatoes are not a breakfast food.
When you hear someone say, "Well, I caught myself lookin'," you know you are in the presence of a genuine Southerner!
Only true Southerners say "sweet tea" and "sweet milk." Sweet tea indicates the need for sugar and lots of it -- we do not like our tea unsweetened. "Sweet milk" means you don't want buttermilk.
And a true Southerner knows you don't scream obscenities at little old ladies who drive 30 MPH on the freeway. You just say,"Bless her heart" ... and go your own way.
To those of you who are still a little embarrassed by your Southerness: Take two tent revivals and a dose of sausage gravy and call me in the morning. Bless your heart!
And to those of you who are still having a hard time understanding all this Southern stuff, ... bless your hearts, I hear they are fixin' to have classes on Southernness as a second language!
And for those that are not from the South but have lived here for a long time, all y'all need a sign to hang on y'alls front porch that reads "I ain't from the South, but I got here as fast as I could."
Southern girls know men may come and go, but friends are fahevah !
Now...... Shugah, send this to someone who was raised in the South or wish they had been!
If you're a Northern transplant, Bless your little heart, fake it.
We know y'all got here as fast as y'all could
BillySFCVFD
Oct 17, 2008
Ben Waller
In reply to your last statement, there's a difference between using wit and cynicism and in using labels and stereotyping. That's why I don't make fun of any individual based on their membership in a group...ANY group. I especially don't do it when brother and sister firefighters or medics are involved. I consider it the highest form of respect to relate to every firefighter and medic with whom I have contact on the merits of their abilities, experience, and individual relationships.
If I'm acting a little like a training officer on this one, it's because that's what I am. Part of a training officer's job is to educate other firefighters and medics on how to be improve themselves in all aspects of their profession. In my mind, that includes demonstrating respect for my fellow firefighters and medics, including consideration for something that may not be a big deal to me but that may also be offensive to them.
The fact that some members of a particular group don't mind a particular brand of humor doesn't make that humor any less offensive to other members of that group.
I work with several firefighters of Polish descent. They're my friends. They don't take offense when someone tells a "Polack joke" because they believe that the joke-teller is simply demonstrating personal ignorance. Nevertheless, I'd never dream of telling a Polack joke either to them - or to anyone else - either in public or in private because I respect my friends and fellow firefighters/medics that much. I also don't want to join the ranks of the ignorant.
In the end, regardless of whether or not you - or others - believe that ethnic/racial/regional/religious "humor" is funny or not, it can be percieved as disrespectful by others.
Chief Rick Lasky has an excellent lecture on the essence of being a firefighter called "Pride and Ownership". http://emergencystuff.com/1593700784.html One of the points he makes is that it is important to have passion, honor, and pride in our profession. Part of that passion, honor, and pride is having mutual respect of the highest order for each other, and routinely demonstrating it. I try to do that on a daily basis.
That is the essence of my point.
Ben
Oct 17, 2008
Mac Conant
Im up north in maine. we go by the name "Maineahs" We dont used the letter r very much at all
(That sentence in Maine Speak is as fallows)
Im up hee-a (here) In maine. we go buy tha name Minahs. We dont use the lettah r vary much at tall.
We say yall as well...
Yall have good-en!
Oct 17, 2008