Firefighter and Divorce

Why firefighters get divorced .

We are just like everyone else. We get divorced over money, infidelity, insecurity, lack of romance, married to young, "I'm tired of being your mother" and all the other reasons people in other careers get divorced. But here are some added reasons.

#1. Jealiousy- It can be very hard when your spouse hates their job and the people they work with. They hate to get up and go to work while you happily bounce off to do the job you love and get paid for doing it. Ever heard "All you do at work is goof off with your buddies" Or " I don't want to hear anything else about the firehouse that's all you talk about".

#2. They fell in love with that guy/gal that's willing to help anyone in need "He'd give you the shirt off his back" . The problem with folks like us is not that we are willing to give the shirts off our back . The real problem is "There's always somebody ready to take it".

This quality they so fell in love with suddenly starts cutting in to their time. Ever heard " Can't you let someone else help them for once". I know you volunteers have heard this before when the pagers goes off the second time in the middle of the night and you go. ( you wanted to go the first time but you didn't want to start a fight).

#3. You are part of a family that they can't fully be a part of or understand. Your friends are all firefighters. So when you do get together you always talk about fire stuff. Ever heard " Can't you guys talk about anything else, don't you get enough of that at work" And if your spouse does make an effort to join in the conversation they are quickly repulsed by they subject matter. I know you have heard " How can you laugh about that, that discusting"

#4. In a marriage where someone is less than happy, being gone 24hours at a time leaves to much time on their hands. When the cats away....

#5. You work to much. You might think your wife is shouting from the roof tops how proud she is of her brave husband that works all day and night at the fire department and then goes to his second job on his days off and works another 40 hours a week. In reality you are complained about t her friends. You are always gone. You are always tired. And you are always at work and not helping enough around the house and with the kids. You heartless bastards lol

These are just a few reasons but I wanted some opinions. Do you agree or not? I have plenty more and maybe a few solutions.

Sincerly yours, Mr. looking for my future exwife :o{)

  • Doug

    Hahaha, nice
  • Tiger Schmittendorf

    I can't believe you're taking credit for writing this.

    I also can't believe my wife told you all that...
    LOL
  • Chasefire

    I wrote it.
  • Tiger Schmittendorf

    I was kidding about that comment.

    I was joking that you were taking direct quotes from my wife.

    Your observations are true-to-life.
  • Jessica

    yes ive done the same to my hubby, even though im in the dept. too, but then again hes done the same to me about staying home. SO its not just the wives its the hubby's too.
  • Art "ChiefReason" Goodrich

    I admire your cynicism.
    Hope you find "Mrs. Right".
  • lloyd

    I'm on my second marriage of 18 yrs and still on my honeymoon. It was my ex that got me interested in the fire dept. to begin with and all was fine til she realized that some of my calls might interfer with what she had planned. Like Christmas eve, at a theater with 6 cub scouts, etc. Go figure, it's the nature of the job!
  • Chasefire

    Thanks for writting lloyd, Funny how they forget all the holidays we are there for . If you work 24 on and 48 off, we have a 1 in 3 chance of being home the entire day on holidays. One of my top 10 reasons I love my job, I am usally the only dad at my childrens school field trips. And That leads me to my first bit of advice to any firefighter looking at a divorce. Find an attorney that has worked with firefighters in the past. ( I have a feeling you won't have to look far to find one through your coworkers). #1 You don't want to spend $180/hr + explaining the kellyday system to an attorney. #2 opposing attorneys love to try to make our work schedule out as hurtful to our children. A good attorney that has experience working with firefighters can not only blow holesin that theory but can point out how we can be more active in our childrens life than 40hr a week folks. ( when my kids come home sick from school I'm there to pick them up. NOT a babysitter. Well gotta go. I'm meeting my daughter at school for lunch :) Thanks again
  • Niki

    What you wrote is so true. My ex got me started in this field, and then got mad because I love the job. Funny how my children understand better than he did and still do. My girls know what to expect when that pager goes off no matter what holiday, day or hour. They know MOM has a job to do. I believe that is why I quit trying to date, some people just don't understand.
  • lloyd

    my advice is not to give up on finding someone that will understand. my wife now, jumps up at any hour of nite, and hits the maps. we cover 100 sq. miles of gated community and have 640 miles of paved road along with 8000 structures. our non involved fire houses give some basic directions, but i can always cout on my wife and the cell to do a better job. she willingly comes along with when we are out during the day and i get paged. and she is aalways there for our social things. there are some good ones out there. keep the faith
  • Becca

    I am glad to hear that others are willing to tell the truth. I too got i married to a man I meet in the fire service and we spent 16 yrs together until he decided to get out and I was not willing to do the same. I am happy with the FD and teaching, my boys understand also that I have a important job and they think it is very cool mom is a FF.