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Comment by Jenelle on April 21, 2009 at 10:01am

Wow......thanks for the invite.......I truely have enjoyed the stories and the pics that I have read.......the have brought a much needed smile to my face....thanks......

Comment by Fireyladd - Retired Chief Sharp on April 11, 2009 at 12:43am

friend sent it to me.

Comment by Deanna on April 10, 2009 at 6:36pm

Too cute Chief, where do you find them =)

Comment by Fireyladd - Retired Chief Sharp on April 8, 2009 at 12:09pm

It is definitely getting very bad!

Cats are so dramatic!!

Comment by Mick Shelley on March 30, 2009 at 9:17pm

Hey Justin, Happy to be a part of your group, always looking for a good
joke, Keep em coming.

Comment by Frank Svitak on March 26, 2009 at 1:23pm

Black Panties !

Anna had lost her husband almost four years ago. Her daughter was constantly calling her and urging her to get back into the world. Finally, Anna said she'd go out, but didn't know anyone.

Her daughter immediately replied, 'Mom! I have someone for you to meet.'

Well, it was an immediate hit. They took to one another and after dating for six weeks, he asked her to join him for a weekend in Vermont. Their first night there, she undressed as he did. There she stood nude, except for a pair of black lacy panties; he was in his birthday suit.

Looking her over, he asked, 'Why the black panties?'

She replied: 'My breasts you can fondle, my body is yours to explore, but down there I am still in mourning.'

He knew he was not getting lucky that night. The following night was the same--she stood there wearing the black panties, and he was in his birthday suit--but now he was wearing a black condom.

She looked at him and asked: 'What's with the black condom?'

He replied, 'I want to offer my deepest condolences.'

Comment by Frank Svitak on March 26, 2009 at 1:17pm

The Vet Gets EVEN ! !

One December day we found an old straggly cat at our door. She was a sorry sight, starving, dirty, smelled terrible, skinny, and hair all matted down. We felt sorry for her so we put her in a carrier and took her to the vet. We didn't know what to call her so we named her 'Pussycat.'
The vet decided to keep her for a day or so. He said he would let us know when we could come and get her.
My husband (the complainer) said, 'OK, but don't forget to wash her, she stinks.' He reminded the vet that it was his WIFE (me) that wanted the dirty cat, not him.
My husband and my Vet don't see eye to eye. The vet calls my husband 'El-Cheap-O', and my husband calls the vet 'El-Charge-O'. They love to hate each other and constantly 'snipe' at one another, with my husband getting in the last word on this particular occasion.
The next day my husband had an appointment with his doctor, who is located in the same building, next door to the vet.
The MD's waiting room and office was full of people waiting to see the doctor. A side door opened and the vet leaned in - he had obviously seen my husband arrive.
He looked straight at my husband and in a loud voice said, 'Your wife's pussy doesn't stink any more. We washed and shaved it, and now she smells like a rose. Oh, and, by the way, I think she's pregnant. God only knows who the father is!' Then he closed the door.
Now THAT, my friends, is getting even!

Comment by Julia Heltemes on March 21, 2009 at 1:05pm

I laughed so hard at the Taser story I had tears rolling. I hope you are able to find all of your "personal" belongings and they return to their rightful place.

Julie

Comment by Fireyladd - Retired Chief Sharp on March 21, 2009 at 2:02am

LOL Jeremy

Comment by Jeremy Hoffman on March 19, 2009 at 10:59pm

Ok my friends lets have some more fun shall we. If a little language bothers you don't read this one, but it is still funny.

A college professor was doing a study testing the senses of first-graders using a bowl of Lifesavers. He handed out each student a Lifesaver one at a time and asked them to identify them by color and flavor. The children began to say:
''Red.......................Cherry'',
''Yellow..................Lemon'',
''Green......................Lime'',
''Orange.................Orange''.
Finally, the professor gave them all Honey flavored Lifesavers.
After eating them for a few moments, none of the children could identify the taste.
''Well'' he said, "I'll give you all a clue. It's what your mother may sometimes call your father.'' One little girl looked up in horror,spit hers out and yelled,"Everybody spit them out.........................they're assholes!!

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