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Comment by Tabitha on November 7, 2010 at 9:29pm

Hello ladies,
Just joined the site yesterday and new to the group, excited to be here. I just recently took the FDNJ written exam. If anyone has any tips, advise, anything, especially for the physical exam please share. I've always had the greatest respect for firefighters and wanted to join the department for many years now. Honestly nervous and anxious about it all but going full force no matter what. Great to see I can finally talk to woman who have experienced being in this field. Hope to hear from all soon.
Have a great day ladies!

Comment by Stephanie Shirk on October 18, 2010 at 10:34pm

Thanks Lisa its great advice! You have a great story I hope I can experience half of it!

Comment by Lisa Matschke on October 16, 2010 at 12:53am

It's amazing to see and hear how many sister firefighters are still struggling with the issues of respect and acceptance, and everyone's favorite: You can't do this, you're a girl.

Anyone who has done this for more than a few years knows how much progress we've made in the fire service, but it doesn't seem to be enough. I've spent 23 years as a FF/EMT, CPR instructor, CISM debriefer, arson investigator, grunt, hosejockey, Captain, Lieutenant, and Fire Chief's wife. Yeah, only people who were interested in taking a ride in the ambulance as a patient and not as an EMT made the mistake of calling me "the Chief's wife".
Stephanie, it will get better, and yes it takes time. Is this career still 'old boys club' biased, you bet your ass! You need to stay true to the reasons you wanted to be a Firefighter. Don't let the boys know they've rattled you, and they'll back off. Go on calls, go to training, be there doing and learning everything, never back off. Some male Firefighters give new, female firefighters a hard time because they are seeing the women do everything they do. They may have more strength than us, but I've always been glad for my small size and flexibility.

To Amanda: Where is your sense of self-preservation girl? If your 'boyfriend' makes cutting and gender biased comments like that, would you really trust him to have your back in a fire? I know lots of male FF's who express hesitation about their wives, daughters and sisters being Firefighters. But, those same brothers would NEVER say what your 'boyfriend' has. I've been in Fire and EMS for 23 years, and yes, married to a fellow firefighter. My husband has always had reservations about me doing this, but as it's his fault I'm doing it, he can't complain too much. He was an Army Medic, got out of the service, missed the rush, joined Fire/Medic. When we started this together, he would find ways to keep me off of some of the bad calls. Then when he could see that I wasn't just sitting back, waiting for someone else to do the work for me, he became one of the biggest supporters I know for female Firefighters. When you add the fact that we had 2 small children, and a busy life off the Dept, we worked out our misgivings. His main objection was that he would worry about me if I were in the burning house, taking the Psych Patient to the hospital, or rescuing stranded travelers on the Highway during a blizzard. Valid, yes. Convincing, no. We kept doing this for several other Fire Departments, and when he saw the way our brothers accepted me for WHAT I was, and not WHO, I was, he quit worrying about me as a female FF, and just kept it at the fellow FF level. He became a Lt on our Dept, and the next year, I was put in an Lt. position. When he had been an Lt for two years, I was made Captain. (So much for the sleeping your way to the top theory!)When I had been a Capt for 1 year, he became Asst Chief, and the next year Chief. I was still a Captain, still rolling full time, and getting my ass chewed and lectured by the Chief more than any other Firefighter on our Dept. Why? If he was aware that anything I had done that could possibly be a problem, I was lectured twice as hard. If he didn't 'slap my hand', some would say I was being shown favoritism, so I got my ass kicked on a regular basis. Did I mind? Not really because I knew what the reasoning was, and understood his position. There wasn't anything for them to nail me with, so they just stopped. He has always respected me and my wish to do this, even if it made him uncomfortable. He was always supportive, and didn't have a problem introducing me to fellow Firefighters at trade shows, training, calls, etc, as his Captain. Some would notice the name, some never got it, but he didn't make me feel as if I were doing something above my capabilities. He would push me to train more, harder, and be better. Never did he say the things that have been said to you. I've heard the same remarks, but usually out of the mouths of the insecure, ignorant, and less capable male FF's. Dont let anyone make you second guess yourself, or bully you into quitting, if being a FF/EMT is what you really want. You'll still hear nasty remarks from some, it's impossible to have that many people work together without a clash of some personalities. But, if you know what you're capable of, your skills, and weaknesses, the remarks will roll off of you. Does it still cause hurt feelings, resentment, anger, stress?Uh, yeah! If you're confident and secure, it's a moot point. Looking back at the reasons you started this is the best motivation you can get. Trust yourself, don't count on anyone to tell you what you want or need.

Comment by Stephanie Shirk on October 1, 2010 at 12:39pm

A Probationary Girl’s Story
Yes, I am a firefighter or shall I say fireman I respond to calls, go to drill and try the best that I can
My entire department they’re egotistical jerks overly filled with pride but to tell you the truth, I’d do anything to be the fourth on their ride
They definitely know how to bust your balls especially when we get back from running our calls
Many of them believe they are cooler than cool but each of them had a phase when our tones being paged out made them act like a fool
They all have stories about women and beer, and the weird part is, I am starting to like that they let me hear
In the worst way I want to be in their club but that takes skills that I don’t yet have enough of
I want so bad to gain their trust but at the rate I am going I will be older than dust
Some think I don’t belong here, that’s fine, but it will take more than that to change my mind
I honestly get more excited then they do when the pager goes off and I make the first crew
Each time I see them it’s a constant reminder I’m searching for a fireman within and I’m going to find her!
Accepted yet Respected!

Comment by Amanda Munden on September 23, 2010 at 8:40pm

Hey, I am a firefighter and also am dating a firefighter who is on the same department and on another one as well. However, it is very difficult and I was hoping to get some advice from other women who are in relationships with fellow firefighters. It is difficult to get respect from him and he doesn't think i should be on the department because I am a woman and can't do the same things he can (mainly because he has a lot more experience and training than I do because he has been on for 2 years more than me). I really do my best but because he knows my insecurities and weaknesses that no one else knows he doesn't think I can do it. Does anyone have any advice for me to prove to him that I am just as good of a firefighter (or at least have the potential) as he is and am not inferior to him because I am a woman??????

Comment by Lacey Hudson on August 19, 2010 at 12:31pm

Hello ladies!
My name is Lacey and i live in Wichita, KS. i am thinking about becoming a fire fighter, do you have any tips and tricks or work out regimens you may be able to share with me? Or how it is being a female in a mans workplace?
-lacey
Contact me here or my email Just_lacey86@yahoo.com

Comment by Laurie-Anne Dunn on August 13, 2010 at 12:14am

Hey all. I'm a volunteer firefighter/mfr in Sydney River, Nova Scotia. Stay safe, and take care, everyone!

Comment by Willie Weiss on August 12, 2010 at 7:59pm

Hello to everyone . I'm a volunteer firefighter/emt in Alabama. I've been on the department almost 10 years and love every minute of it. I work with a great bunch on guys. Really helpful right from the start. Let's all stay safe and "everyone goes home"

Comment by ranni simone on July 31, 2010 at 4:01am

hi to all of you girls out there,im a firey in a very male dominant station.befor i joined there was only 2 girls an 18 guys,now we have 5 girls an 15 guys...have to say we have a few males who dont mind us girls being at the station,and there are a few who i personally think we would do something else(kitchen duties maybe)lol....but i will keep fighting my way through...and show these men that women can do the job just as good if not better lol....glad there is a female group on here

Comment by Candace Wardell on July 30, 2010 at 7:53pm

This is a great group! It's great to read some of your stories. I am the only female on my department so it is great to hear that their are others out there. I get along great with the guys and love every minute of it. Stay safe sisters!

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